I know you're reading this...BOTH OF YOU

Recently I fell off the Friendship Boat with someone I knew for about a year. We were super close to each other and we suddenly got into a heated argument. Now I lose friends all the time and think nothing of it. No fights but we all drifted apart and went separate ways. Totally cool with that, we all need to do that at some point in our lives and move forward to look for something better. On occasion when we see each other we remain civil, say our "Hi how are yous," and we catch up as if the years of silence never happened!

This one on occasion however it was a huge fight. I have not had a huge fall out with friends since the 8th grade... and we all left on bad terms. So when it did happen it shook me really bad. Didn't quite fully understand what had happened, but about a few weeks ago i decided to drop an apology. It's something I very rarely ever do but when it happens, just know that it's super genuine because if I feel strongly about something, I never apologize for it.

But something didn't feel right about the situation... regardless, I wanted to amend what happened even if she didn't feel like talking to me. At the time I wanted to apologize for being a bitch and for attacking her friends in the process. No one coerced me into apologizing. I did it out of my own free will. So that's what I did, and we briefly talked.

It wasn't until we started talking again that I finally found out... we didn't fall out because of each other... It was a misunderstanding because of a third person.

This is how our argument went down:

Third party told us information, i took one side, she took the other. we fought. end friendship.

That's what it looked like at the time right?....Turns out there was more to it. Enter the fourth party.

Fourth party tells me weeks later what really happened between Third party and Fourth Party. 


So now it actually looks like this:

Fourth party and third party had a fight, third party told us falsified and twisted information, me and her unknowingly took opposing sides.

Arguments are one thing... BUT FEEDING US BOTH FALSIFIED INFORMATION AND TWISTING THE TRUTH CAUSING US TO END OUR FRIENDSHIP... you have stooped to a new low.



Information about the third party:
Third party dated fourth party. fourth party was my friend, third party was her friend. 
Fourth party breaks up with third over coffee.

Where the information was twisted:
Third party twisted information and said she sweetly kissed him willingly.
Fourth party actually said he was imposing on her and wouldn't let her leave the coffee shop. 
HMMM.....

What our argument was about but it shouldn't have really happened in the first place:
my side: they broke off mutually, who cares? she probably wanted to end on a good note.
her side: she's leading him on... that is a bitchy move.

That time she was attacking my friend so I attacked HER friends. See what went down?

I know BOTH of you are reading this.
J: we shouldn't have fallen out as friends, I shouldn't have attacked you or your friends (they did nothing wrong so I'm gonna take the full blame for that)

Alex KS: I'm NOT going to apologize for what I am about to say/type. You are a sick bastard who has no regard for anyone but yourself, you never think about the repercussions of your actions and it's affect on other people. What you perceive to be real is actually what YOU made up. You twist information around (and I've seen you long enough to deduce that) and because of that, look at what has happened. You've even gone as far as to contact MY friend after I have repeatedly told you NOT to contact her. (BTW, further contact to her in ANY away shape or form WILL result in a restraining order AGAINST YOU. You need to BACK THE FUCK UP.)


The lessons I've learned out of this?
- Friends come and go.
- Fix what you can fix.
- Apologize and own up to your mistakes.
- Remove and distance yourself from troublesome people.



EDIT: I know I'm playing the blame-game and pointing my finger right now, AND putting their name up on the interwebs, not the best thing to do. BUT if this was outside of the internet, we'd ALL be doing the same thing.
Also, I do know the repercussions if Publicly Type His Name.
"Looks bad on him and on you," "He'll have to live with it for the rest of his life," " You'll look bad in front of potential employers and you won't get hired." "You're a hypocrite, look what you're doing."

To that, I say I don't care. I will do whatever it takes to protect my friends. Too often the victim gets blamed, but never the person who actually initiated it in the first place.